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Monthly Archives: September 2012

A Birthday Party Fit For A Tween

My daughter is turning 13. Evidently, turning 13 is the new 16 and a big deal is made by all. Izzy wanted something along the lines of this lil number. (Look up!) But when I went around town checking these “numbers”, the numbers were just too dern high for a single momma. This beauty was gonna cost me about $175.00 smacks.


So, we compromised.  At least one of us comprimsed.  (Me.)  We decided on an ice cream cake. For 20 big ones, I could live with that. So, we ordered the ice cream cake.

And yep, it was ugly. And there were tears involved because “everybody will laugh at me because my cake is so tacky.”

Ummm, ok, really?

So, I went to TWO other ice cream cake joints and we settled on a cake that wouldn’t make all the other 13 year old’s laugh at her.

 (Gimme a break.)

After the cake catastrophe, we hit Hobby Lobby and bought them out of gift bags, streamers and oh yea, a helium balloon machine. (If your tween talks you into such foolishness, remember to use your 40% off coupon.  You can even pull it up on your phone and they can scan it.

So, we are armed with a helium tank I have no idea how to use, $30.00 worth of balloons that light up when you actually figure out how to get the helium in the sucker, $50.00 bucks worth of candy ~ I know, I know. But I figured I could use the left over for Halloween.

The cake(s) Yes, we had two; due to the first being ugly and all, were anxiously sitting in my freezer, waiting to be devoured.

 “How about if I take y’all to the dollar movie?” I ask lovingly.

“The dollar movie? Mom, we can’t go to the dollar movie, my friends will think we are poor.”

Oh My Aching fanny……………………..

The day of the party finally comes and I decide to surprise my baby and get a lil fancy with her birthday decor:


Walking into the house after school, I could tell Izzy was trying to be gracious about my birthday decor. But really, she was mortified. The only thing she said was “Whoa y’all, my mom must have been playing in our Christmas decorations again.”

Ummmm nice.

That night, the girls were perfect dolls. They informed me that they wanted to go to the dollar movie. Turns out, that’s where they all go on spend the night overs.  After dinner at Red Robin, the girls sat outside our home; chit chatting, sucking on the helium from the tank and talking like Donald Duck.

Not a filled balloon in sight….

At 12:30, I gathered them inside with the promise “y’all come on in so you can eat some pretty ice cream cake!”

“Cake?  Cake???” They all asked horrified.

“We’re full.  But thanks anyway.”

Neither cake has yet to see the light of day….

How To Not Be Stressed

This is how I feel. Except the big guy in this picture should be wearing horns. THEN, that’s exactly how I would be feeling.  We let go of Bear two weeks ago. I took him to the vet and after they picked themselves off the floor from the ghastly gas that was emerging from his grapefruit size tumor, they said, yes, it is time to let Bear go.

I picked up Izzy and Jake from school that day. We came home and did what southerners do when they mourn: Cook.

I cooked home made pralines that were absolutely scrumptious.

We also made home made pizza.  It’s my specialty.

In fact, this experience of loss has started some new crazed cooking phenomena in our home. (We loved Bear very much.)

Every night for weeks now, I have slaved over the hot stove, not to mention outside grill, preparing delicious delicatessen.

The result for me?

6 pounds.

Major weight gain for me means…

More mourning.

And we’ve already established what a true southerner does when she mourns….