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Good Morning Blubbering

Woke up this morning. Got kids off to school. Walked back inside as the phone rings.

Nurse Patience: “Good morning Ms. Worry Wart, this is Nurse Patience and I am calling to give you some information about your child’s camera scope tomorrow morning.”

Me: ”Sure!”

Nurse Patience: “OK, first of all, is she sick right now? Because if she’s suffering from that cough she had last time she was in the Dr’s office, we will have to reschedule.”

Me: “No, no, actually, since she’s been on the Qvar inhaler, Singular, Zantac etc., she hasn’t been sick in nearly 6 weeks.  It’s unbelievable!!!!! Say, do you really think I should even do the camera scope??  I mean, she’s doing SO much better!!! And for this camera scope, y’all do have to put her to sleep and all…..”

Nurse Patience: ”Well I’m looking at her records and  the doctor did see a diverticulum on her esophagus. That does need to be checked out but you can wait if you think that combination of meds are working. It’s your call. There is a note that a surgeon will be with them to assist if they think surgery is needed.”

Me: Alarm sets in. “Oh my stars!!! I forgot about the surgeon. He’ll be there, huh?Oh, I guess he’ll have his scapula with him, right? Well, I dunno. It’s just that’s she’s so small, a lil baby. Have you ever met my child?? She’s precious!!!!!”

Nurse Patience: I’m sure she is, Ms. Worry Wart.”

Me: ”I just hate the idea of her being put to ~”

blubber blubber blubber……

Nurse Patience: “Oh Ms. Worry Wart, please don’t cry, it’s gonna be OK. Has she had trouble with anesthesia before and that’s why you’re so upset?”

Me: ”No, I mean yes. She’s had anesthesia before and no, she didn’t have any trouble. She’s just ~” blubber blubber, snotty nose choking.

Me: “My lil baby and ~”

Nurse Patience: ”Yes, yes.” (Her voice is so soothing)  “I understand. How old is your baby?”

Snort. Snort. Sniff. Cough. Clear throat.

Me:  “12 years old. What if the man with the camera scope sneezes and rams that camera thingy right into her throat???? Then what????? It will damage her vocal cords, she could never speak again!!!!!!!!”

Nurse Patience: ”Well, I’ve never heard of that particular thing happening …but understand your concern and I will leave the decision up to you.”

Me: ”What would you do? I mean, like ~ are they gonna cut her sweet innocent throat wide open and yank that thing out? What kind of bestiality is that??????”

Loud blubbering.

Nurse Patience: ”No, now that’s not how it would be removed. They are very gentle. What would I do if it were me? If it was me, I think since you are so upset it would be OK to wait a while…maybe until she’s, um 40?”

Me: No, no, I need to do it. We need to find out why that lil diverticulum is on there and I would die if I canceled this appointment and she gets sick one week later ….just you know what, let’s keep the appointment.”

Nurse Patience: “OK.”

Me: ”OK.”

Nurse Patience: “Ms. Worry Wart~”

Me: Snort/gulp. “Yes?”

Nurse Patience: ”It’s going be OK.”

Me: ”OK.”

Nurse Patience: ”OK.”

Me: “OK.”

Nurse Patience: ”See you both tomorrow morning.”

Me: ”Maybe. Just kidding.”

 

Please keep Izzy in your thoughts and prayers tomorrow morning. Pray for steady hands and clear thinking (nasal passages) for the doctors. Also, please pray for her momma not to faint in the waiting room.

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